One of the biggest problems with oral and written communication skills is the lack of good grammar skills. Poor grammar detracts immensely from a listener's ability to concentrate on the speaker's message. Many people think poor grammar reflects on the intelligence of the speaker and will reject the message without evaluating the meaning. The same response applies to poor spelling in written communications.
If poor grammar is a problem area, enroll in a community college English program and learn these skills. Some community colleges offer professional writing courses for the workplace as well.
Another problem area with effective communication skills is the use of repeated phrases throughout conversation; phrases such as "you know". If that is a problem, start speaking more slowly. If you are not certain your listener understands, rather than say "you know", say "Does that make sense to you?" or "Do you understand what I am saying?" Wait for your listener’s response to those questions. These remarks are good check points that your listener is following along with your message and also gives them a chance to give you feedback or to ask questions. Working with a speech coach can prove very beneficial in overcoming these problems.
Still another problem in good communication is the use of “jargon”. Every profession or activity has its own terminology and acronyms. There is a lot of jargon in the world today – computer terms, texting abbreviations, sports terms, internet terms, acronyms, software terms, and business abbreviations. Be wary of using this jargon with someone who is unfamiliar with this terminology. They will nod and smile as though they understand but they will be completely confused when they leave you. They will go in search of someone who can speak to them in language they can understand. While it may be tempting to show off expertise in a particular field, it's probably going to send the wrong message to the listener.
Another communication problem is the failure to truly listen when someone is speaking to you. If you find yourself overly eager to say what you want to say in response to their comments, then you're probably not fully concentrating on their message. The worst offense in this area of communication is interrupting someone while they are still speaking. Most people find that extremely annoying and if you do it often enough, they will avoid being around you. It sends the signal that you are just not interested in what they think or say and that you believe your input is more important than theirs. It also exhibits very poor manners.
Speaking too softly or too loudly is another problem in effective communication. This is a problem if people constantly ask you to repeat what you said (too soft) or they back an extra foot or two away from you (too loud). Again, this is an area that a speech coach would be very helpful in overcoming.
Accents, such as some southern accents and some northeastern accents, can really work as a hindrance to good oral communication. Many people have a built in distrust of someone who speaks very fast and with a northeastern accent. Some people have that same issue with a southern drawl. Many people will make an assumption about the intelligence of the speaker based on their accent. Their assumptions block them from truly hearing the message.
No matter how much we feel that being judged by our accent, our grammar, or the rate of speed with which we speak is completely unfair, it’s still a fact and most listeners can't overcome it. It’s an instinctive survival skill to distrust the unfamiliar. Listeners will have a very difficult time overcoming that instinct in order to hear the message.
Since the listeners can’t or won’t overcome it, it is up to the speaker to work on improving in these areas. There are resources available to help with this - usually at a community college or private tutor. It is not easy to overcome the patterns of speech that have been used all of one’s lifetime. It takes work and practice. However, the benefits of working on these problem areas are very great: better paying jobs, more friendships, more comfort and ease in a job, and an appreciation of the struggles of others to learn good communication skills.
This article first appeared at www.factoidz.com, authored by Lorena Williams
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