After 37 years of marriage. Jake dumped his
wife for his Young secretary.
His new girlfriend demanded that they live
in Jake and Edith's multi-million dollar home and since the man's lawyers were a
little better he prevailed.
He gave Edith his now ex-wife just 3 days to
move out. She spent the 1st day packing her belongings into boxes crates and
suitcases.
On the 2nd day she had to movers come and
collect her things.
On the 3rd day she sat down for the last time at their
beautiful dining room table by candlelight put on some soft background music and
feasted on a pound of shrimp a jar of caviar and a bottle of
Chardonnay.
When she had finished she
went into each and every room and stuffed half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in
caviar into the hollow of all of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the
kitchen and left.
When the husband
returned with his new girlfriend all was bliss for the first few
days.
Then slowly the house began to
smell. They tried everything cleaning mopping and airing the place out. Vents
were checked for dead rodents and carpets were cleaned. Air fresheners were hung
everywhere.
Exterminators were brought in
to set off gas canisters during which they had to move out for a few days and in
the end they even replaced the expensive wool carpeting. NOTHING
WORKED.
People stopped coming over to
visit. Repairman refused to work in the house.
The Maid quit.
Finally they could not take the stench any longer and
decided to move.
A month later even
through they had cut their price in half they could not find a buyer for their
stinky house.
Word got out and
eventually even the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally they
had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new
place.
The ex-wife called the man and
asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She
listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be
willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house
back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea
how bad the smell was he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the
house ha been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She
agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the
paperwork.
A week later the man and
his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything
to take to their new home.
INCLUDING
THE CURTAIN RODS.:)
